Oftentimes, when getting to know other professing Christians, I will ask what church they attend as a simple icebreaker. It is usually an easy way to discover shared convictions or meaningful differences and to continue the conversation from there. Occasionally, however, the response is some variation of, “I don’t go to church,” a statement that ought to give any Christian pause. Scripture presents the church not as an optional accessory to the Christian life, but as Christ’s appointed refuge for His people—an oasis of living water amid a dry and judgment-laden world.
Hebrews 10:24-251 makes it clear that forsaking the gathering is actively failing to love, since the believer who withdraws not only neglects worship but refuses “to stir up good works” commanded. This article is not looking to dig deeply into this passage, as often the debate is met with familiar objections, raised as talismans to blunt the force of this command. This article will rather address those objections in a goal to show the local gathering of believers is vital to our walk in life and necessary to exhort one another.
“My relationship with God is personal/private.”
A private faith actually contradicts the imagery that God gives us of the church. In 1 Corinthians2, believers are stated to be the members of one body, not autonomous individuals. Ephesians3 shows that body of believers being a household of God being built together—not privately—for the Spirit to dwell in us. Christ Himself tells us4 that our faith necessarily has a public visible witness lest our witness be good for nothing and be trampled upon by men.5 Scripture never envisions a believer who belongs to Christ but not to His people.
It can be difficult for some—particularly introverts— to move out of the private prayer room and into the household of God, but it is important for believers to be part of the body. Just as Paul says that a whole body of an eye would be useless for hearing,6 a lone heart would not have the lungs required to bring it oxygen, or vessels to bring it the blood it pumps. The earliest Christians knew this and devoted themselves to a corporate means of grace.7 They knew that while we have a personal relationship with Christ, that relationship is fostered in the gathering of believers.
“I can get better teaching/worship elsewhere (podcasts, online).”
Online teaching may inform, but it cannot shepherd. Ephesians8 tells us that Christ gives pastors and teachers not just for the information they provide as a steward of God’s mysteries,9 but for the growth and maturity in love as we come together. My favorite podcast pastor was not there for me as I sat in the waiting room for my wife’s hysterectomy, but my pastor was. He stayed with me all day, embodying the truth that Peter10 tells us of being among the flock, and nurturing the sheep willing and eager to do so.
Believers are to submit to known leaders who watch over their souls,11 and that cannot be done through the technology of a subscribe button. Preaching is tied to pastoral responsibility and discipline,12 not merely the exposition of a text. Scripture binds teaching to authority, presence, and care as we see elders are made overseers of a particular flock,13 not a nebulous group of online personas. This isolation can detract from the spiritual nourishment fostered from the church leaders exhortations.
“I’m disillusioned with the church (hypocrisy, judgment, drama).”
Hypocrisy is condemned–but separation is not the remedy. As mentioned previously on this site,14 the church contains wheat and tares until the final harvest.15 We cannot become disillusioned to assume an unbiblical expectation of perfection—even the apostolic church had hypocrisy they had to deal with.16 Unity requires patience with sinners17, of which we all are. Even if one were to find the so-called “perfect church” once joining it would lose its status of perfection.
Church hurt is a real thing that people can understandably become discouraged by. That pain is not a figment of your imagination, but Christ does not abandon His church because of sinners—He sanctifies it through sinners. This is why Colossians18 tells us that bearing with one another is our Christian duty. For those reading this that are regular church-goers, come beside those visitors and encourage them. When we bear one another’s burdens, we fulfill the law of Christ.19 Let those disillusioned come to the waters as we gather, being called to one body.20
“I’m a Christian, not a ‘church person’; I focus on the Bible/Jesus.”
As noble as this might seem, Christ and His church are inseparable. Christ loves the church as a bride, dying for it.21 Yes, Christ died for individuals, but He also died for a group of people—His bride! Our response cannot detach Christ from His body, as John22 tells us that our love for God cannot be separated from our love for His people. Our love for Christ is expressed through obedience and love for others;23 so to claim a devotion to Christ while rejecting His bride is a category error.24
Christ and His church are inseparable; as Christ tells Paul that the persecution of the church is a persecution of Christ Himself.25 When we focus our relationship inward, we deny others our gifts in the body and in turn deny them to Christ Himself. But, when we focus our relationship into the community God has provided us, often in our efforts to exhort and encourage others ends up encouraging us! We have a man at our church who wrote a devotional book26 I bought to encourage his work, and came away from reading it very encouraged by the insights therein. When we gather, we focus on Jesus by continually building up one another.
“I can’t/don’t have time (work, health, family).”
Our Time is a stewardship that should be shaped by worship priorities, not carnal ones. Joy is always found in going to the house of the Lord.27 Jesus tells28 Martha that it is far more commendable to gather and worship before Him than to outwardly serve. In fact, the kingdom of God supersedes all other things29 even things seen as necessities. It shows us that what we view as a lack of time is ultimately a matter of reordered loves. God has commanded time for worship30, and when we put it on the back burner we are disobeying that command.
Scripture treats worship—particularly corporate worship—as foundational to our life, not peripheral. Sometimes work can come in the way of gathering on Sunday, but honestly appealing to God in prayer that your work situation change, and working with your work leadership can help realign your schedule to be aligned to church. It took me over a year at work to get a position that did not require travel on Sundays so I could enjoy the gathering, but it was worth the effort and time spent to do so. Be involved with your elders, so that as trials arise regarding health or family the lifeline is there to be pulled back into the raft of safety and encouragement with God’s people.
Each of these objections, while emotionally compelling, collapses under the weight of Scripture. The Bible does not merely recommend being involved in a local church—it demands it as the ordinary, regular beat of the Christian Life. It can be hard to form this habit, but as one trains a muscle for the building up of their body; one can train up the spiritual muscle of joining the local church body for the building up of one’s soul. If you’re unaware of a bible believing church in your area, many search tools are available to help you find one. The North American Presbyterian and Reformed Council has a search tool to find any one of their affiliate denominations near you at https://www.naparcsearch.com/.
When searching, look for the biblical marks of a church31 in your search because if the Word is shallow, everything else will be superficial–even if the church appears vibrant or warm. Be sure to talk to the leadership, not just a door greeter. A healthy church would welcome questions from a visitor to their faith and practice, whereas an unhealthy one would deflect questions. Remember patterns matter more than a single Sunday, as a single sermon rarely tells the whole story of the church’s teaching. After visiting for a while, ensure you are willing to submit, not just attend.32 A church you cannot imagine submitting to is one that you should not join. Finally, remember that the question is not “are there problems?” but rather “how are problems handled?” Every faithful church will still have imperfections–from the lack of comfortable seating to the occasional mystery fellowship meal dish, to perhaps something more serious. God places believers into bodies, and we should be praying throughout that process. A believer should find a faithful church and attend it–while it might not meet every preference, it will meet God’s purposes every time: to preach Christ, shepherd His people, and to prepare them for glory.
- NKJV – And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as [is] the manner of some, but exhorting [one another], and so much the more as you see the Day approaching. ↩︎
- 1 Corinthians 12:12-27 ↩︎
- Ephesians 2:19-22 ↩︎
- Matthew 5:14-16 ↩︎
- Matthew 5:13 ↩︎
- 1 Corinthians 12:17 ↩︎
- Acts 2:42 ↩︎
- Ephesians 4:11-16 ↩︎
- 1 Corinthians 4:1-2 ↩︎
- 1 Peter 5:1-3 ↩︎
- Hebrews 13:7,17 ↩︎
- 2 Timothy 4:2-5 ↩︎
- Acts 20:28 ↩︎
- https://thoughtsinthelight.com/2025/11/10/the-dilemma-of-the-baptist-spiritual-gift/ ↩︎
- Matthew 13:24-30 ↩︎
- Acts 5:1-11 ↩︎
- Ephesians 4:2-3 ↩︎
- Colossians 3:12-13 ↩︎
- Galatians 6:2 ↩︎
- Colossians 3:15 ↩︎
- Ephesians 5:25-27 ↩︎
- 1 John 4:20-21 ↩︎
- John 15:12-14 ↩︎
- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category_mistake ↩︎
- Acts 9:4-5 ↩︎
- https://www.amazon.com/Job-Sovereignty-Suffering-Providence-Misunderstood/dp/B0FFHLZY2W/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0 ↩︎
- Psalm 122:1 ↩︎
- Luke 10:38-42 ↩︎
- Matthew 6:33 ↩︎
- Exodus 20:8-11 ↩︎
- Faithful preaching of the word, right administration of the sacraments, & biblical church discipline (Belgic Confession Art. 29) ↩︎
- https://thoughtsinthelight.com/2025/11/25/the-keys-the-flock-and-the-fold-a-reformed-defense-of-membership/ ↩︎
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